This Shabbat we announce the upcoming month of Elul, the month leading up to Rosh Hashanah. Even though I’ve already been in preparations for the High Holidays for weeks, the Shabbat when we announce Elul hits me like a ton of bricks. I always introduce the blessing for that month by singing a High Holiday melody. You know it. We sing it in the evening as we begin Yom Kippur. It’s a melody that is in our bones, a visceral connection to those holy days. Something about the notes activates a part of me in such a powerful way.
I can’t exactly explain how it works, but I’m often drawn to a metaphor from one of my teachers, Rabbi Marcelo Bronstein. He would teach that if Rosh Chodesh Elul is about finding the key to the Gates we hope to walk through, the Shabbat when we announce the upcoming month of Elul is looking for the flashlight that helps us find the key. The image is one that I love. I picture myself messily looking on the ground, in the dark, for the lost flashflight, maybe knocking something over in the process. It’s not even the flashlight that I really need! But the flashlight helps me find the key that will open the gates.
This all feels so representative of what it means to do the work of reflection, introspection, and renewal. One, the process doesn’t always feel clean. The work of digging into ourselves sometimes brings up a mess with it. That’s OK. It doesn’t have to be tidy and neat; it’s life. Two, it’s not a one and done endeavor. There are different steps in the process. The first one leads to another, and another. Engaging in the work of ourselves builds on itself. And if we can’t do the work to even look for the flashflight, then we are stuck in the dark.
For me, the melody that we’ll sing as we announce Elul is part of that flashlight. When we sing it tomorrow, I will close my eyes, and imagine crawling around in the dark looking for the flashlight. And I’m still asking myself - and I hope you’ll ask yourselves, too - what are we looking for this year? What are we hoping the flashlight illuminates? What are the gates that we hope to walk through, and who do we want to be on the other side?
