From the time I was a little girl until I was 11 or 12, a core part of my identity was being a gymnast. I especially loved the uneven bars, mastering a skill where I felt I was flying through the air. I wasn’t a serious competitor, but I’ve always had an affinity for gymnastics and have loved watching women’s gymnastics at every summer olympics. I was watching closely this year. And this week, we all watched, stunned, as Simone Biles left the floor.
I’ve never been one to idolize athletes, and I’m reluctant to call her a hero (we have many heroes of the past year and a half if we’re looking for inspiration), but Biles modeled something valuable for any of us that often prioritize things beyond ourselves.
I’ve been thinking about the Jewish concept of tzimtzum, a practice of retracting. This concept emerges from the Kabbalistic framing of the Creation of the world, where God, taking up all possible space in the universe, retracted in order to make room for the world. In this framework, pulling back isn’t merely stepping away and rejecting, stepping back is a practice that gives way to something else. It makes room for something not possible before.
We are all expected to do things that are hard. And there is certainly value in pushing ourselves (I hope no one is doubting that Simone Biles has pushed herself). But often, the things that we strive for, or the things we are excellent at, we are expected to excel in no matter the cost. Sometimes stepping back, making room for ourselves, making room for our health, our own well being, shows greater strength than the muscle required to keep pushing ourselves.
Until now, Simone’s story has been a story of triumph. She has been an athlete par excellence who powered through, accomplishing the near impossible. This is what the world has expected her to do; this is what the world expects of all olympic athletes. This is the version of the story the world believes she should be telling. But Simone changed her story this week, because for the first time, she decided that she wouldn’t power through at her own expense.
She sets an example and gives us all permission to see how we can incorporate a practice of tzimtzum, how we can each carve out more space for ourselves when our own well being is threatened. I can’t imagine how Simone, heralded as the greatest gymnast of all time, made this decision. But she decided that her mental health and her safety was more valuable than the gold medal she could have won.
Her story is changing. She is changing what defines her, and she reminds each of us that we have the power to change what defines us as well. She will be remembered not only for what she did on the gymnastics floor, not only for what she did for the gymnastics community (a community that by and large failed her), not only for what she did for the entertainment of others, but also for what she did for her own health. I hope that she serves as a model for each of us, reminding us that our health, our ability to thrive as individuals, can also be the prize.
Shabbat Shalom Rabbi Sarit
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